Prepare to “Insult, exult, and all at once” (As You Like It, Act 3, Scene 5). Because today we’re reviewing the epic Shakespeare Insult Generator from Becker & Mayer! Wither you stub your toe on a rock, or are trading barbs with your bitter rival…if your situation requires a fiery oath or stinging retort, you are in good hands with the Bard!
Retailing for around $9 on Amazon, this little spiral-bound volumes includes 162 Shakespearean words. The pages are divided into three sections (the top and middle sections are adjectives, the bottom section is a noun). The sections can be quickly flipped to create 150,000 original insults.
The cool thing is when you flip each section, the word is defined on the back. So if you are wondering what a “scut” is, it’s actually “the short, erect tail of a deer.”
In addition to being visually pleasing, the book comes with a fascinating and humorous introduction. Among other things, you learn that words marked with a feather icon means they were most likely invented by Shakespeare. Words marked with an “N” are ones he only used once (also referred to as “nonce” words). As you can see in the above photo, all three words are nonce. Amazingly, of the 162 words in the book, 22% were invented by Shakespeare, and 64% are nonce! That’s some amazing word-smithery, that is.
In addition to being educational, this book is FUN. The insults are quite creative and quite satisfying to select. In fact, we recommend buying two books so opponents can pair off and parry insults back and forth from stage right and left! Highly recommend.
I couldn’t resist busting out a little Oliver! at the end of the shoot. If you look closely, you can see that I truly got into character by smearing mud all over my London orphan face.
Twirl, leap, coast and spin! The skating rink is open and you’re invited to strut your stuff, courtesy of a magnet attached to the bottom of a toilet paper tube skater. If things start to get a little chilly, glide through our cozy hot chocolate shack for a fill up!
We read Little Red Gliding Hood, written by Tara Lazar, and illustrated by Troy Cummings (Random House, 2015). Little Red is a great skater, but her ice skates have definitely seen better days. When a skating competition is announced, along with a prize of brand new skates, Little Red is thrilled. Unfortunately, it’s a pairs skating competition, and she has no partner. Unfortunately, while searching for a partner, she encounters the Big Bad Wolf! After a face-paced and spirited chase across the ice, he finally catches her. But he’s not going to eat her…he just wanted to tell her that her laces were untied! Turns out the not-so-bad Wolf needs new skates too, and he’s a great skater to boot. The day of the competition, Little Red and the Wolf enter the completion. They put on such a great performance, the judges give them a perfect 10 and the grand prize!
Next, use construction paper and markers to turn your tubes into a pair of ice skaters. In keeping with the book, one of our skaters was Little Red, and the other was the Big Bad Wolf. Katie put this adorable duo together, and added a bit of red ribbon for Red’s hood and the Wolf’s sash.
Hot glue a button magnet to the bottom of each tube.The bigger the magnet, the better the results on the rink! Our magnets were 0.75″ in diameter. We tried smaller ones, but they just couldn’t keep the connection.
Next, hot glue button magnets to the bottoms of 2 corks (but test to make sure the skater magnets and the wand magnets attract before hot gluing them to the corks). We used champagne corks because they have a bulge at the bottom that was easier for little kids to grip. But wine corks work too.
Now for the hot chocolate shack! Cut the bottom and 2 sides off a small tissue box. Your shack should have no floor, and the doorways should be tall enough for your skaters to glide through easily.
We used tagboard for the sides of the shack and the roof, but construction paper works too. Cut and color the sign and 2 windows from the shack template and attach them to the shack. We reinforced the sides of the box by gluing craft sticks on above and below the windows and on both sides of the doorways. The final touch – a chimney- is totally optional. Cut a 
Place your skater on the top of the box, then place your magnet wand underneath the box. The magnets will connect through the cardboard, and you can start skating!
Plunk your hot chocolate shack down, crank up the Tchaikovsky, and skate!